Ann

STEP 11

Step Eleven: Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out."

The author tells how this is her favorite Step. It enablers her to "Go with the flow". It helps her plug in and listen to her higher power and lets her know when it is time to surrender, let go, work harder, focus, receive or take care of herself.

Improving Conscious Contact

The author tells how her recovery started with a prayer. She had stopped talking to God when she was young just prior to becoming an addict and she had lost touch with him until she began recovery. She believes that is when her soul finally opened up. At first she just did the actions and that was enough, but soon she started to trust in his will for her. She states that the relationship with ourselves and our HP are the most important in our lives and if we can create loving relationships, the rest will be easy. This step teaches us how to do that through prayer and meditation.

Sought Through Prayer

Each of us is free to have our own HP of our choosing. We can talk to this HP by praying and this can look like anything we want at anytime we want. We can do it kneeling, walking, standing in line at the bank, out loud, through letters or any other way we see fit in any language we want. The more we talk to our HP, the better the relationship becomes. We can use existing prayers such as the Lord's Prayer and may find that getting into a ritual at first, maybe morning and night, will help us get into (or back into) the practice of communicating with our HP. We can ask our HP for help and guidance, to watch over the ones we love, about our feelings or fears, anything we want. The author shares how she used to pray for God to help her control others and wondered why he didn't answer her prayers. She has stopped doing that. She has learned to accept her current circumstances and that perhaps God's will doesn't match her own. She believes God's will for us is to love and accept ourselves. To care for ourselves and be honest.

Meditation

"Praying is how we talk to God. Meditating is how God talks to us."

As with praying, meditating is specific to the individual and can be done many different ways. We may read meditation books, listen to meditation music, get therapeutic massage, and some may practice more traditional methods of sitting by themselves in quiet.

However we do it, the goal is to become quiet and centered. To be open to our Higher Power and ourselves. The author gives the analogy of meditating to putting gas in your car. It rejuvenates and gives us the opportunity to set ourselves in the right direction. It is not a waste of time. It gives us more energy and focus to complete our tasks.

God's Will for Us

"Prayer is how we become transformed; meditation is how we become renewed."

As Codependents many of us stress and worry about things from our past and future. Things we can not change or that have not even happened yet and may not. Prayer gives us the opportunity to talk to our HP and ask for guidance. It helps us trust that things are as they should be. It helps us go with the flow. It enables us to let go. It can take time and practice, the results are not immediate, but if we trust the process we will see the results. Taking time to talk with our HP and listen for guidance will help us see our next steps, whether it be taking action or even doing nothing. It helps us listen to ourselves and keep our goals of self-love forefront and quiet the chaos we sometimes create with stress and worry.

"This Step tells us that we have a path, and no one can interfere with it. We don't have to hold on so tightly. Others do not hold the key to our happiness, nor do they hold the key to our lives."

Activities

1. Have you begun the discipline of prayer in your life? What does that consist of? What are your feelings and fears about praying, about talking to God? What time of day works best for prayer? Do you have a favorite place?

2. How do you meditate? Do you like meditation books? Which are your favorites? When is you best time for reading a meditation? Do you like tapes? Have you experimented with any other forms of meditation?

3. What other activities help you relax and get in touch with yourself?

4. The next time you get stressed, instead of pushing harder, you might want to walk away from what you are doing and find a way to get quiet and centered. If you are at work, you may want to retreat into a private area-your office, if you have one, or even a bathroom will do. Breathe deeply, then let go of your thoughts, worries, and chaos. Allow peace and healing to enter your body. Stay with it as long as you can or as long as you need to.