I had a lot of initial resistance to attending Al-Anon at first. I did a lot of research up front to understand what I was dealing with.
A few things I did learn; (1) Yes there is hugging (with strangers no less), (2) They never told me to divorce or split with the RAW, (3) They all had the same problem I did and (4) they helped put some structure back in my life.
The structure piece is what I was missing, things are not perfect everyday but they are better than they were six months ago. The hugging thing took some time to get over, but I finally did and I hug the people I want to hug. I also got over the initial feeling of being new, feeling like I had been labeled a loser for the situation I was faced with.
I attend a small meeting, usually 5-6 people. Being near a rather large military base I thought the groups would be larger but they are not. The small group thing has been awesome, we are able to have discussions that are meaningful and full of insight in addition to the reading of daily literature.
Shop meetings if you have to, speak or don't speak, pray or don't pray; bottom line to attending the meeting is to listen.
Hang in there, it will get better over time.