Legna, I'd like the thread to get back on track to what you were originally discussing.
If I read your post correctly, you explained that you don't feel comfortable locking down the credit cards, cash, etc. I advise you to think about a future possibility, that your spouse blows through thousands of dollars and jacks up the credit cards with purchases or cash advances and you are stuck with debt because you are married to her. At that time will you wish you had just locked down everything so she can't abuse the money? My guess is yes.
In just 6 months my husband blew through $2000 in cash, not to mention what he pawned and what he charged on the cards when he didn't want to spend cash because cash was for drugs. The credit cards are in my name, my husband WAS an authorized user but I have removed him, first from one card and just this morning from the other. Now he has no ability to charge anything. He recently applied for a credit card in his own name, and of course didn't tell me about it when he did it but lobbed it on me later. It hasn't arrived yet and I have the key to the mailbox, so I'll make sure I cut that thing up. He'll still have the card account, he just won't have the card. Let me tell you, I don't feel one bit guilty about doing this. I will ensure that he has what he needs, it won't cause him a problem.
Fortunately we have no joint bank account. He does have some money in his individual bank account, but it's not a lot so if he blows through it it won't be a major disaster. I have access to view the account details so I'll see what he's doing.
You sound like a very very intelligent and reasonable person. Don't worry that you are being excessive. You are the person in your relationship with the good sense. You need to protect both of you. It's bad enough that your wife is ruining herself, it would be worse if she ruined you too. Don't even let it get there.