Actually, I do compare addiction to cancer quite frequently so you're preaching to the choir here. lol However, as with any disease, addiction has it's own manifestations and cannot be equated with cancer other than stating that it is a disease (the ol' apple and orange thing). There is no set protocol for dealing with addiction that has a 90 percent or 60 percent or 30 percent recovery rate. Perhaps someday this will change......who knows.....there is tremendous amounts of research and we can all be hopeful. I agree with you that addicts do not specifically choose to become addicts (although choosing to use initially prior to addiction setting in is a choice--much like choosing to smoke cigarettes is a choice that can lead to cancer). Addicts do have the choice to seek treatment or not.....just as a cancer patient would have the choice to pursue treatment...or not. It isn't often that you run across cancer patients (early stage) who refuse treatment of some kind....not the case with addiction.....they often resist treatment with every fiber of their being. It is part of the manifestation of the disease.
My point in bringing up my son's prior treatment had nothing to do with him not "trying hard enough" or any critical observation on my side. I accept fully that it often takes more than one run at recovery and I'm certainly thankful that my son is doing it in a manner that relies on his own resources as our support (financially) had been pretty tapped out at this point and he is not insured. I'm glad to hear that you also accept that your son may or may not be successful in recovery in his first go-round and I'm glad that you (as we have been) are supportive of your son's efforts toward recovering from a pretty dreadfully debilitating disease.
You seemed to take my post quite personally and it was not intended that way at all. I was simply sharing some of my story and agreeing with your comments. lol. I had diverted from the OP to welcome you, share a small bit of our story, and express my hopes for your son (I was the one who diverted from the original topic....not you. lol)
The last two paragraphs of my post has nothing to do with you or your post but was simply me stating my thoughts on the various approaches to addiction treatment......in response to a few of the posts prior to yours. My point was obviously missed and/or misinterpreted. No worries.......I just wanted to let you know that I was not directing anything at you other than the comments above those two last paragraphs to welcome you to SR as a first time poster.
And no since I've been reading here, the only comments I've seen are things like, but cancer patients didn't chose to get cancer and addicts choose to use drugs, and addicts can stop if they want to anytime, and family of cancer patients are treated with respect, but we are not and our situation is different.
I'll have to read a little further in the forums to figure out where you might have seen these types of statements. I've been on SR for a while now and I don't think I have ever seen a statement that addicts choose to become addicted (from anyone who has any understanding of addiction)--quite the contrary. I have seen people pose the question asking for feedback to understand the disease model in an effort to educate themselves and gain a better understanding. I don't think I've ever seen a post that stated that addicts can stop anytime they like......and if there was, I probably skipped over it because it's ludicrous. I do believe that in order to recover, the addict does need to be highly motivated.
Again, I am so very happy that your son is seeking treatment. I hope that he continues to work toward a healthier life. Heroin is a tough one to kick and it sounds like he has wonderful support from his family. That's great! I have many friends who are addicts in recovery (with long term recovery at that) whose DOC was heroin. So although a tough one, it is certainly not hopeless!
I hope you stick around. Read more. And keep an open mind. This forum is full of people who are in all phases of dealing with an addicted loved one. One person's concern and love for their addicted loved one is not greater or lesser than anothers. There are many parents here on SR who can relate to much of what you have experienced.....and many of them have been dealing with addiction for many years. Some of them have lost their beloved children to overdose........a forum like this runs the full spectrum of experiences and most of us can only speak based upon our own experience, strength and hope.
Again, welcome to SR.....there's a lot of great information here and a tremendous amount of cummulative experience. I'll look forward to reading more of your posts in the future.
gentle hugs
ke