bemyself, that was a good book review. I've had a big shift in how I view happiness. I used to view happiness as "the absence of pain". I don't see it like that anymore. Happiness, for me, means I don't fear the pain, or use any and all means to escape it, but rather I see it as woven into all parts of life.
As far as the negative talk that is in some posts, I'm torn on that. On the one hand, I don't view real talk as negative. ie when I say "I was not a good mother. I was disconnected from my children because I was a drunk. I put them in horrible situations. Some of the damage is irreparable." People might say, "aww, soberlicious, don't beat yourself up over the past." but I don't see it as beating myself up. I see it as acknowledging truth. Some amount of shame is involved, because shame is an appropriate emotion for me to have when looking at my very shameful actions.
That said, perpetual negative self talk that goes beyond acknowledging truth and moving forward...I believe that can keep a person stuck. I think the messages we give ourselves are very powerful. I also believe they can be changed. One who follows the AVRT paradigm might also see the kind of negative talk that you listed in the OP, Non, as straight up AV, plain and simple. Not separating from that, of course, can keep an addicted person drinking/using.
Maylie is right. There are times that being positive appears less than empathetic to someone in crisis. But you know, some people tend to be a little more "chipper" than others, kind of like a basic personality trait. I get messed with all the time about it by my friends "Could you please stop with the f*cking bluebird on your shoulder?!"