Have you thought that both things can be true? It is a disease but it's your own fault when you drink? That's my approach.
Compare it to a peanut allergy or diabetes. You can't have peanuts/sugary snacks or you will become very ill. But you (or the pleasure center of the brain - whatever theory suits you) likes peanuts/snacks a lot, so once in a while you eat some peanuts, feel good for a while and then get the allergic reaction, that others don't get.
So it's your fault that you had those peanuts (or alcohol) as you knew you would get sick (a disease) from it.
Solution: Find something that gives you joy, but never drink again (or eat peanuts)
