You can definitely do this, Jim.
I also drank for 30 yrs. and now have 5 yrs. sober. My drinking career ended just after I joined SR. I gathered all sorts of strength and courage from my friends here - and I knew I could rise above my old way of life.
I have many of the same regrets that you do, but I caution you to try & let them go as much as possible. Regret, remorse and guilt - sent me back to drinking a few times. I finally decided to be kind and patient with myself. The real you will shine through, and you'll have a wonderful, joyful 'rest of your life'. No more being numb and foggy. Be proud of yourself for seeing what needs to be done - and taking this big step. We're glad you found us.