Dear KittenBoo, I understand what you are saying. After I drew boundries with my own personal alcoholics---I had to make adjustments, also. I became KEENLY aware of drinking everywhere I saw it---similar to you.
Since I had not grown up around alcoholism (and I am basically a non-drinker--although I have been known to drink), I think I was too tolerant of alcoholic behavior for a long time.
Now, I do not let PROBLEM drinkers into my personal life--at all. It is impossible to avoid all drinkers in this society--and, certainly ALL drinkers are not alcoholic. I have become pretty good at identifying the difference, lately.
I have (GRADUALLY) learned to mind my side of the street--and attend to my own personal boundries. It does no good to preach or to take other peoples inventory. However, I don't laugh when others think alcoholic escapades are "funny". I also leave a situation that makes me too uncomfortable. If I go out with others that are drinking, socially, I usually don't drink--or just have one drink. I don't explain myself. If things get out of hand--I politely excuse myself--and get the H** out of there!
I understand the feeling that EVERYONE must be a heavy drinker. There definitely are so me circles where this is TRUE!! Heavy drinkers like to group themselves together--I helps them to feel "normal" and validated.
I will say, though, that this world is made up of millions of happy, productive, and fun people who do not drink---or are not problem drinkers. ***Perhaps the universe is sending you a message?? If you have found yourself surrounded by only heavy drinkers--to the exclusion of non-drinkers---maybe this is a sign al that you need to make some changes in your environment. Maybe, it is time to expand your boundries and make some life-style changes. To do new things. I think we all get into "ruts" in our life. It may be time to step outside of your own comfort zone and meet new people, go to new places, and to do new things.
What do you think????
sincerely, dandylion