Hello Graciousone. I'm sorry you are having to deal with this. Please check out the "friends and family of substance abusers" thread. I think you'll find great comfort there as we can all relate to how insane trying to deal with an addict is. If your boyfriend doesn't want help the best thing, truly, that you can do for you is seek help for you. I"m glad you've found this site. It has been a such a gift to me. Stay strong...and please trust we all understand the "confused state" you must be in. We all found our way here due to being in exactly the same spot.