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Old 03-02-2013, 06:46 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Kindeyes
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Come to a meeting everyday, call him twice a day, stop associating with those who were not recoveing addicts -including me.
To the best of my knowledge, no one in a 12 program will "suggest" that an addict pursuing recovery should stop associating with those who are not recovering addicts.....but they will strongly suggest that they stop hanging out with people they used drugs with.

And in my experience, it may not be a good idea for an addict pursuing recovery to hang out with their codependents who don't understand drug addiction and codependency. A codependent who is unaware of the dangers of codependency to an addict's recovery can be very harmful indeed. And, speaking for myself, I was completely unaware of my own codependency for a long time.....it was my own form of denial. A strong codependent and an addict are a very toxic mix. An unaware codependent can undermine the efforts of a recovering addict........all the while doing so with the absolute best of intentions.

Not suggesting that anyone here is toxic or codependent......just sharing my experience.

I have to agree with Ann's statement. If I ask someone to leave me alone and they don't, they are being disrespectful of my boundaries. SweetPea....you are hurting so very deeply......and so is he. These powerful emotions give addiction an excuse to rear it's ugly head--not because of you--but because of an addict's inability to manage their own emotions well during early recovery.

He needs space and time. If it's meant to be.....it will be.

Take care of you.

gentle hugs
ke
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