Back here after a 6 week bender.
I allowed myself 1 drink on Christmas day while I was with family. That 1 drink has turned into 6 straight weeks of daily drunkenness. I've managed to 'only' call out of work an average of 1-2 days a week. I've burned through my entire year's worth of vacation days and it's only the beginning of February. I feel like my body's been beaten up, especially my liver. My house is a complete mess - piles of unopened mail, laundry strewn everywhere, got a few fines from the city for not shoveling my drive/sidewalk because I've been too drunk. All I've done for 6 weeks is get plastered alone and stumble into work a few times a week.
Something very good happened to me on Thursday, I won't get specific but it resulted in a raise and was a boost in my professional life. I've spent the past 2 days "celebrating" (getting drunk alone at home.) I feel like absolutely hell right now physically but my mind is fairly positive. I just want to get better and have freedom in my life again to do what I want again, instead of being confined to my home drinking vodka all day, every day.