lizatola

Me too, but what I've come to realize is that I have done my own share of feeling victimized. I would go through my own 'woes me' and wonder how on earth did I end up with this man. I am coming to a place where I am finally redirecting my resentments. Sure, I resent what AH has done, but the 'feeling' is keeping me stuck. I am starting to own my part.

I was a victim, but I also chose to remain a victim(and still do, to some degree). I stayed in a bad relationship for many reasons, one of which was that I didn't honestly realize that I had choices that I could make to change both myself and my situation. Now that I'm finally realizing that I can choose differently, I see my resentments as a path to opening my eyes. I'm grateful that I have anger and resentments honestly, because it shows me that I do have feelings and that I can express them and that I do deserve better. Before the resentments came about I was just wallowing in self pity, totally oblivious to how I was allowing the demoralizing of my SELF to continue.

I, personally, don't experience rage but anger and resentments are allows there and festering below the surface. I am finally learning to set my expectations low or to not have them at all. Doesn't make for much of a relationship but at least it's bringing me awareness and that's a heck of a lot better than it's been for me in a long time.