Hopes, being isolated with an alcoholic is so painful. Anyone who has not lived it would ever know how stressful and chaotic and emotionally damaging it is. People on the outside see the "functioning" alcoholic, but the people who live at home have to watch him metamorphose into an entirely different person who is generally hateful, bitter, and dangerous.
It is good you have found us and I hope we can offer you good support. As mentioned by others, you really do very much need to try Al-Anon meetings. They last an hour. No one has to know your last name or who your alcoholic husband is. You do not have to talk or explain why you are there. You can just listen. The meetings follow a structured outline which is the same the world over. Some people at the meetings are new. Others at the meetings have been attending perhaps 10 or 20 years. There are free pamphlets on alcoholism and the family. There are good books on recovery. If you attend a meeting or two each week, I promise you that for the hour you are there, you will feel peace. You will feel safe. And over time, your own answers to your situation will come, as you begin to reconnect with your inner voice which you have not been able to hear for so long.
Things can get better. But recovery is a choice and it takes some action on our part. I hope you will try some meetings, you can shop around until you find the group for you.
They say that recovery for the alcoholic almost always begins with recovery in the family. So you can take that first step and see what unfolds. Give your Higher Power several months to work with you.
Good luck and welcome to SR.