Originally Posted by
amy55 
None of these programs ever contacted me to see how he was acting outside of the program. I think this is something that needs some attention.
Exactly right. There is a wide range in how programs are run. The best ones DO contact the victims to get their take on how things are going. They all should, I believe. I think you might have misunderstood what the counselor was saying about the privacy issue, though. The counselor might have meant that he couldn't tell you how he was doing in the group, or he may have meant that he could not directly confront your ex with what you said happened for YOUR protection. Your ex's privacy would not be impacted by the counselor's asking him about it, but yours would.
In any event, this is one of the things we are working on, to get everyone on the same page. Safety plus accountability. That's our mantra.