Update; he's home
So AH is back. He claims he has had all these revelations. He was all over me physically and we already had a discussion on how he's making an effort so why am I rejecting him? I basically told him I was uncomfortable and confused. I confronted him about his cheating accusations and how that made me feel. He was hugging me and says, "does this seem like a man who thinks his wife is cheating on him?"
I'm more confused than ever. He said his brother's sad bachelor existence that he witnessed back east was enough for him to realize that his home is here and that he wants our family back.
He said that if I keep rejecting him than, of course, he will start to pull away again. I have no idea where to go from here or how to proceed with caution. I told him I've heard all this before so why does he expect me to follow his 180 so cavalierly? Man, I have a long way to go.