Lara- I am both an addict and a wayward spouse. What has your husband do e since the discovery day? You should check out survivinginfidelity.com - very helpful to me a d my wife. We are currently in limbo, and I'm working on improving myself.
You should get that man into individual counseling and try to get all of the truth out of him. Such a weight was lifted when I copped to everything I was doing wrong. Mind you it takes time to break the lying habits, but there is hope for you if that's what you two want.