Welcome Chloe,
Wanted to say hello,seems like we share a similar situation unfortunately. My husband also got hooked on pain meds. He is 10 months clean now, and has been using individual counseling for treatment. (He did go to a non-12 step inpatient rehab for a few months, but it was also based on individual therapy). We do marriage counseling also,and I have been doing individual therapy; never tried narc-anon meetings either. Our son just recently turned the big "1”
I am glad things have improved for you since October. I have found that it does get easier as time passes. But still I get scared sometimes, and I wish I could protect my husband. Like you I have learned that he has to take responsibility for his health and be the one to stay away from the drugs. It also helped me to realize I don’t want to have a controlling type of relationship with him. I want us to be partners, and we have to respect and trust each other in order to do that. Rebuilding trust takes time when you have been on a rollercoaster but it can happen again I think if both people work at it.
I try also to keep in mind that within our relationship if I focus too much on the addiction stuff; worry, control, it throws the whole relationship out of balance. I have to let him become an equal partner again within my mind, so we can continue to move forward, and appreciate all the more enjoyable aspects of our relationship together.
Sounds like you have great support, and family. How is the situation with his brother now?