Thank you all very much for the replies! So much to take from them...
I do not do this alone. While I have not yet embraced AA, I completely rely on my higher power. I am Catholic to be exact. I will admit that on those days I caved, I walked away and allowed my AV to speak. Wrong. Very wrong.
I really appreciate the advice to prepare now for the day and days to follow a gathering. SBTS and Doggonrcarl, I come from a very large family and I happen to be the one with the home that can accommodate the crowd. The invitations for the shower have gone out and I expect 60 people in a few weeks. I have been able to host these events...it is the days that follow that I will have to prepare for. Now that I see the pattern, I may decline to host the events in the future, but the invitations are out for this one.
Thank you all.