Lovesunandsnow, thank you. We are sorry we're dealing with this too, but patience has completely run out now. SD is adamant she doesn't want to see her mother again, and we cannot force it. To her, not calling her on Christmas Day this year (she didn't bother last year either) is the final nail in the coffin. We opened our house to her on Saturday, listened to her apologies and promises of improvement and just 3 days later she lets her daughter down, yet again. How much does she think her daughter can take! At this moment in time, I honestly don't know if forgiveness is something SD can find as she is so angry with her mum. We certainly won't be inviting her over again! She can ask to come, of course, but I don't see contact between the two of them helping SD at all, because all she'll get is more lies and empty promises. Mum clearly isn't ready to stop drinking and her health is deteriorating, but we all know there is nothing on this earth that we can do to change things. I think that for SD, acceptance is the way forward and preparation for her mum to die unless she dries out. She sees her school counsellor weekly, has done for 14 months, so we will encourage her to speak to her counsellor about this next week when she goes back to school. I don't see what else we can do.