Not trying to be self righteous, lord knows I blurt things out sometimes.
....the other day wife had a meeting and a new guy got an earful about what he needed to do, a couple old timers intervened and told the crisstalker to back up a bit or the guy would not come back and he hasn't.
When we are around here enough it's easy to shrug stuff off... On my first visit I was in tears and scared ******** and needed a hug before the blunt truth. Unless someone is in danger the 'just pack and go' message doesn't penetrate... Most people need time to understand a bit first and internalize the three C's before the simple is possible