No Contact With Adult Son
My AS has been difficult from birth. A counselor told me she had heard that story many time. He had problems with school from the first day. High school was a nightmare, including when he stole the money from the candy he was selling for the band.
After the battle of getting my gifted math and science son to graduate wore me out I drove him to take his GED and sat in the car to make sure he took it and did not leave.
My AS started abusing at an early age and stole everything in my home including Christmas presents. I had to take my jewerly and other valuables to work and lock them up. I came home and my entire home was empty, including my clothes.
He stole my car keys and gave them to two new 'friends' and they stole my car and wrecked it. The two were robbing homes at gun point. I was a single parent and to look back at the danger he put me in scares me. At the time I was too numb from the day to day struggle that I really wasn't aware of it.
My son hated me because I could not controll him and no program was helping so I sent him screaming to live with his father for a while. He ran away and was living on the streets and his father did not call me to let me know. Maybe it was a mistake but I needed a break.
He has been in toxic relationship after toxic relationship, but this one is the worse yet! I have met her 1 time in 3 years and had to call the police to stop her harrassment. Her view is I do not love my son or I would send money.
He was laid off and with the economy had a hard time finding a job. He enrolled in college and was on the Dean's List. They had a fight (he is a cutter and threatens suicide a lot) and he was kicked out and most of his belongings were stolen. He said he was homeless and wanted to finish the semester. I was sending money for 3 to 4 months to help him.
They have another fight, she comes after him with a knife, he calls the police, and she goes to detox and Baker Acts himself. All of it was a lie, they were partying with my money. He was still living there, not enrolled that semester.
Either he or she, one of them, hacked into my computer and were forwarding my emails to her computer (in another state). I have a new computer and I now change my passwords weekly.
He is messaging again for money, when I refuse he treatens suicide and I never loved him and he will stay out of my 'perfect little life'.
He denies it but they are back together. I really don't know where he is and the only contact is FB which I am not a fan of.
My son is alomst 35yo and she is almost 38yo. She is very jealous and has run off all of his friends. He is partly responsible and he has alienated his family.
He is planning to enroll in a 4 year college program with no job and I refuse to be constantly badgered for money.
I made sure he had my phone number to call collect when he is serious about turning his life around. I can't do this any more. I may never see or hear from my son again, and he make committ suicide. I was told in a meeting that there is no way they would cut off contact with their child (by several people).
It did hurt when they said it, and made me second guess, am I wrong to do this? I can't deal with him or her. At least now she can not harrass me any more. My saving grace is there are no children involved. My son has been in many programs and like all of the other addicts is an expert liar. I am so tired of this and I have reached rock bottom. I have many posotives in my life, but only the friends and family of an addict can truly understand the heartbreak.