Yes I have a therapist and I know objectively that just as arguing about xAH's lying did no good, it will never serve me well to confront my family.
Growing up and even as an adult I was painted as the bad one-- didn't matter that I was a great student, good kid, good athlete-- my mother hated me. She's BPD and painted me as the "black" kid and my sister as the saint and my siblings grew up being told and therefore believing that I was the cause of all problems in the family. I caused my father to cheat, to leave my mom, etc...
I rekindled a relationship with her as an adult thinking she was able to be sane. When I did not accept her offer to "destroy" xAH in court by lying and doing whatever it took to in her words "destroy" him, she turned on me and within days, so too did my siblings.
I just can't wrap my head around the fact that grown adults (my mom and siblings) can all live in such dysfunctional/dishonest ways.
I am trying to maintain some relationship with them bc they all claim to care about my D's and don't want me to "punish" the girls by keeping them from my family. But more and more, having any contact at all with my family is just toxic and my D's don't particularly seem to miss any connection with my family...
Just so tired of the dysfunction and drama. It is time for me to move far away from my state.