Hi Pam
I'm really sorry you're going through all that - I really encourage you to get as much support as you can - to that end, I hope you'll at least look at this link - there's so good reading and great links for crisis lines there:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ease-read.html
I know it may feel like it's the only thing you have that makes even a little difference - but drinking's not an solution - it's a lead lifesaver.
Please...do reach out, Pam.
Best wishes for you and your family.
D