Sharkbait,
I think that she did you a favor, by putting you out of that madness. Sometimes it is hard for us to leave them, it is a crazy life trying to live with an addict/alcoholic. She sounds like she isn't anywhere close to wanting to recover. Even if she is wandering if she should fight, it might just be how she feels when sober. But I doubt the hole in the wall is her "bottom".
I am glad you are here as there is much support. I wonder if you could find an al-anon meeting to go to? you sound like you could use some face to face time, with people who have been where you are, and have come out on the other side, happy and able to live a life that is good for them.
It is hard. But it isn't usually productive to wish and wait....turn your eyes inward, to find yourself and what you need. it probably isn't going to come from her, until she makes major changes, and gets sober and finds the road to recovery.
I wish you well. There is life after the chaos of trying to make a marriage out of misery.
hugs
chicory