Old 11-01-2012, 09:01 PM
  # 14 (permalink)  
meadowsis
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Colorado
Posts: 88
Originally Posted by SSHope View Post
In your first post you mentioned that you and your husband are trying to have a family of your own. You also mentioned that stress will be a factor. Having a child myself, I know the sheer joy she has brought to my life. As much as I love my brother, I would never have traded the joy my daughter has brought me in an effort to save my brother. I love my brother and want him well, but would he have given up his addiction if it stood in the way of my having a child? I know that the answer to that is "No."
Thank you SShope, so so very true. Its so hard when dealing with infertility to pinpoint everything, but I know the stress from this situation is definitely not helping.

I actually found out I was pregnant in August for the first time, that same week I got the call from the detective trying to find my brother for a felony warrant (Oh, and my husband was in the wilderness of alaska with no phone coverage that week too). Unfortunately I lost that pregnancy at 6 weeks, and I know that is fairly common when it comes to first time pregnancies like that, but alas, that doesn't stop the mind wondering.

Thanks for the perspective, you are totally right. He wouldn't quit for me to have a kid.
______

I went to my first Nar anon meeting tonight, it was good.

My brother called me today, the same old need to be out of jail stories so he can 'work' his case, hasn't gotten the message I am not bonding him out, he was obviously manipulating me (his stories were starting to cross again), so I very clearly stated I was NOT bonding him out or getting him a lawyer, period. He blew up, but he was being ordered back to lockdown so he had to hang up.

Surprisingly, he called back a couple hours later, and I almost didn't answer, but decided facing it was best and if he was just calling to yell at me I would not talk to him. He actually opened up saying he didn't want to talk about all that 'stuff' (bond, case, etc), and just wanted to chit chat. Told him I was perfectly fine with that, and we spent a reasonably pleasant 15 minutes just chatting and no guilt trips. Rare moment.

Another day in the books, lots of rollar coasters (I was shaking after our first call for a couple hours), but I feel like there was progress in some way, LOL.
meadowsis is offline