djayr, You have to do what is best for YOU.
Personally, I would just finalize the divorce. I would free myself of the financial obligation of the marital home. Not intending to sound cruel or disrespectful but I am sure you have heard the phrase "cash cow". You are supporting her every whim, what would be the incentive to help herself????
Perhaps now is the perfect time, to allow her to face the consequences of her actions/choices. Presently, she has not been uprooted from all the comforts of home that YOU are providing her.
Forcing the house to be sold will also be an opportunity to witness her "true" self/actions, live and unplugged. More is going to be revealed.......
You can either rip the bandaid off, or continue to painfully pick at it.....
Again, time to put yourself first, friend.