Big hugs to you - what a brave woman you!
I know, I have a particular way of looking at the world, which is that everything that happens to me helps me grow. Eventually I can see the gift in it. People who have come in and out of my life, events, family - some that I no longer deal with - all ended up being a gift because the experiences have helped me.
It looks like this is your time to blossom and find out who you are!? What a gift. So good to see you sticking your head out of that shell . . .