You've got a lot of learning to do. Don't we all?
People really need to open their minds. Do people really think they know it all? Understand every trigger? Know all the ins and outs of addiction? Impossible.
I would suggest that some need to learn more, read more, embrace new research. Staying stuck leaves a person - stuck. :-) Dr. Robert Meyers co-wrote the groundbreaking book that I quoted from, Get Your Loved One Sober: Alternatives to Nagging, Pleading, and Threatening A leading addiction expert using a method called "CRAFT - Community Reinforcement and Family Training" which has been shown through research to have a much higher success rating than any conventional approach. And is used as a treatment for the HBO series - Addiction.
New research is coming out yearly. To close our minds is to waste precious opportunities! It's a great book and method for those who want to learn and are in a marriage and or having a family member in their lives with addiction.