my sisters daughter started seeing a man that my sister didnt like. he was controlling, and put a rift in the relationship with my sister and her daughter as my sister made life very difficult for her daughter to be with this man. my sister had had 21 years of controlling her daughters life (even though she would never admit it) and now wonders why she would be with a man who put her down in family environments, isolated her, and didnt treat her the way my sister thought she should be treated. but my niece loved this man, fell pregnant to him, and finally married him. my sister had to change her tact or she was going to lose her daughter and grandchild. so she learnt to bite her tongue and just be there for her daughter and grandchild.
we dont always have to like the choices our children make, but we do have to respect them, and be there for them. (addiction or no addiction involved).
dont loose your daughter because your ego is getting in the way of moving on from being her all knowing mum, to her support crew.