The best I can do is civility.
Yes. That.
Now, my AXH is drinking again. But I was
furious at him when he was at the point of sobriety where your AXH is now. He was 90 days sober and behaved as if the world owed him a fracking Nobel Prize or something. It was as if staying sober for 90 days meant everything he had done over the past 20 YEARS was wiped away and we should throw him a parade down Main Street. Because he had done for 90 days what most people do most of their lives -- stay away from drinking themselves into oblivion every night.
So I'm saying your AXH's behavior probably isn't that abnormal.
And neither is yours.
It's like... he drove the car that crashed into you, and he walked away from the crash and you've just started working on healing your injuries. It's unfair and it's not difficult to become bitter.
I'm kind of thinking Dolly has a point here. Every time you talk to him, you are reminded. Maybe no contact would be better? Make it easier for you to focus on the road forward rather than the road behind?