Originally Posted by Lionhearted1

Hi thanks for the post, I know exactly what you mean regarding holidays i have all sorts of things IT thinks won't be fun but when I do them they are even better. If you have been drinking for a long time and all your experiences are with alcohol involved of course your going to relate it to your addiction I.e holidays birthdays the list goes on.
Start doing those things sober then you will build good feelings and memories around them, I bet those things are much better as your at 100 present.

As for the cunning powerful and baffling it most certainly is, it will come at you with all sorts of feelings memories etc, my av comes at me through my dreams I sometimes wake up thinking I have been on the **** and messed up everything again, but it's just the beast doing what it does. I made a big plan 2 weeks ago after years of bouncing in and out of aa and must say I feel like a free man again for the first time in many years. I own a few companies and am extremely busy and do very well but the more I get the more the beast tells me that iam fine, and alcoholics can't do what you do, you cant be an addict! See it will use my own success on me!!! Good luck god bless.