LeftLucy

Hello!

I am new to SR, and I am a problem drinker. Although I do not drink often (once every other week) I have noticed that when I do, my behavior is quite reckless. I have trouble stopping. Sometimes I can, but other times, no.

I am in my late 20s and feel like I have hit a soft bottom. About once a month, I have trouble stopping once I start drinking, black out, and behave recklessly until passing out. I have done things that have jeopardized my marriage, my safety, my friendships, job, and relationships while drinking. It is like I am a zombie with no off switch. I just keep drinking and drinking. I have been quite aware of this behavior and lack of control for about 5 years, yet despite "setting limits" and "trying harder," I still occasionally have episodes.

I have discussed this with a few confidants, all of whom have different opinions (who of course shared them). Some feel as though I am overreacting and simply "act like everyone my age" and that I am not "alcoholic enough" to consider abstaining from alcohol completely.

Others suggest things will only get worse if I do not take action.

I do not like having no control over my body and my drinking at times, and even though I haven't done anything quite "life-ruining" yet, I don't want to wait around for that. I don't like the regret and self loathing that accompanies my waking up the next day after a night of binging.

I do not crave alcohol; however, giving it up completely does scare me. I feel as though I would lose a lot of friends and activities over this decision. Weddings, parties, vacations -- all involve alcohol with my current circle of friends. I obsess over it.

I know that everyone has different experiences and situations. Any advice for me as I consider a change from someone that has gone through a similar situation?

With respect,

LeftLucy