I felt like that mate!
Another way to think about it is that that fear you are feeling is probably the realisation that you are one binge away from being back in jail. Thats a good fear to have in my book. It might just stop you from using again.
I look at a glass of wine now with absolute fear and horror - that's one glassful nearer another blackout.
That fear makes me realise the power that alcohol has over me and the impact it can have on my life.
I am not confident either, and it is strange feeling. But if I don't get ahead of myself and take it one day at a time, then my fear gets less and less.
I can commit to a day. That's not long.........commiting to 25 years or the rest of my life is too bigger a thought ot task at the moment!
Will be thinking of you xxxx