At the very least - and I hope to God this is already happening - your doggy must be on strong pain medication!! There is no if-and-or-but in that one.
Our dear 16 year old dog died a few weeks ago, we kept him out of pain, he enjoyed his life until the last day. Pain medication, keeping them clearly out of pain, is the number 1 obligation of having a pet. That cannot wait.
I also agree that you are putting words in his mouth. You know, we only get one side of a story on these boards and there are always 2 sides. I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt and would suggest that we all, me included, focus on our actions, our thoughts, our reactions. We aren't victims in life, we are active participants. Can't blame anyone for our problems ultimately except on our own choices.
Get to the vet and get this dog out of pain - today. And if it's her time to go, please do it as lovingly, gently and compassionately as possible! You owe her that - we all do.