Originally Posted by blackandblue

The risk of going back to that dark place and losing everything again is just not worth it. I went INSANE and everyone around me knew it. Why would I do that again? I have no delusion that he is all better. I have no delusion that our love will make everything okay. I am keenly aware that the only hope for both of us is to move on. That is love. Nothing in active addiction resembles love. It is only getting high. All you have to do is be an innocent bystander and watch what happens in the cycle. They are the drug. We are the drug. There is no other distinction. Stay with an addict and become an addict and watch the people you love around you get hurt. Leave an addict and watch yourself and maybe the other person heal. Don't worry they will find their way without us as we will find our way. This is how you love an addict and this is how you love yourself. Otherwise it is until death do you part- married to addiction.

Good luck and god speed... Sorry for the rant... But I feel vulnerable and need to stay strong right now... Hope it helps... Many Blessings.. B&B