Newbeginning010: She hated me for it. Our relationship was falling apart. On top of struggling with economic woes and such, we couldn't get a solid run of emotional stability under our belt to have a unified front. It turned out to be the same sad story....everything I did or didn't do was the problem. I was told I was "controlling"....never wanted to have any "fun"....I was "too emotional".....I "just wanted to play the victim".....I "couldn't be trusted'......the I "have problems too" .....that I "had changed"......the we "were too different"....that I "didn't get her"......on and on and on.
Then when I reached out to her family and friends she told me I had "betrayed her trust"......and that she was a "private person".
She started sleeping in the other room. She kept telling me to get out. One morning I agreed and moved my stuff out. But I stayed for a couple of months longer to give her the opportunity to change her mind. She didn't so one day I just picked her up from work, dropped her off and drove away. Nothing more I could do. That was two months ago.
The rest of her life is falling apart. She lost her job. She lost a second job. She's trying to give her chickens away. Surrendering her dog. Being evicted from the house we rented for the last 4 years and talking about renting a room from the one "friend' in her life that she "went out" with in the beginning. She has been to rehab and AA before.
Now she is saying that God must have a plan for her. As if God's plan always has to come by destroying your life!
She told one of her older boys that none of this comes from her alcoholism. He simply responded "how could it not?"
I will always love her.....but she is a resentment alcoholic....so I hold very little hope of her ever loving me back in any meaningful way even if she gets sober.
God's plan indeed.