For me, it was never about how much i drank or what i drank. It was about the effect it had on my mental state. I would go through periods sometimes where i could just have a couple of drinks. But eventually, sometimes over a period of weeks, that one or two glasses would always inevitably end up at 2 bottles. I am an alcoholic and i know with absolute surety that my illness is progressive - it is only going to get worse. On that basis alone, abstinence was also the only way for me. The fellowships were absolutely central for me - not necessarily in getting me sober, but by keeping me sober. I don'tknow if this helps, but that is my experience x