MightyMung

Hey man, I'm a couple of years younger than you and there are some things that you have to come to terms with if you're sincere about quitting. I know what it's like wanting to change your ways at this age, and it's bloody hard. The following facts are hard to swallow, but once you accept them you can try to get on with getting clean.

- You say you feel very alone in all this. The unfortunate fact is that most people are able to drink normally, especially at our age. Lots of my friends do not even understand what alcoholism is, as to them it remains the illness of the bloke in the corner of the pub, sobbing into his pie and chips and guzzling discount whiskeys. As soon as you realise that you can't drink in the same way that your friends can, you'll stop trying to, and although this may make you feel bitter and resentful (I know I felt this way), it will help you in recovery. Try to ignore peer pressure, get to know your psyche. If you're naturally arrogant, use this to your advantage; think to yourself "I pity my drunken friends". If you're naturally empathetic, think to yourself "I feel sad for my drunken friends." ANYTHING to distance yourself from their behaviour and the peer pressure.

- I know personally I would always attempt to copy my friends drinking styles. I'd be out with friend A on Monday, friend B on Tuesday, C on Wed, etc etc. The pattern here is that my individual friends would be out with me ONE day a week, and i'd be out with my different friends EVERY day of the week, meaning for each day they drank, I drank for SEVEN (including days I was in on my own). Following on from my first point, try to identify your drinking pattern to see if any of this rings true. If it does, you'll likely need to boycott nights out/gatherings etc. It's not the end of the world - in fact, many of my relationships have been strengthened, since people enjoy my company more when it's slightly harder to get that just saying "Hey Jake, I want to get high, what've you got tonight?" Make your time exclusive - realise that you don't need to attend every drinking event, and with time, you'll stop wanting to.

- Hobbies. I've found one of the reasons I became so adept at drinking/ amateur pharmacology is because I had a void that needed filling. So, I became the group authority on drugs, drink and how to justify it to oneself. I would peer pressure others into drinking/using with me, because my scientific knowledge convinced them that they were safe. I am actually responsible for two hospitalisations that I regret more than anything. The point i'm getting at, is that for people our age who may not have found a solid hobby before getting into drinking, drinking is likely to have become our hobby. Whether or not you took it to the extremes I did (I was tempted to sort of brag then about how "extreme" my behaviour is: old habits die hard...) you should consider whether there was anything missing that caused you to start drinking. I for one had NO hobbies whatsoever. I'm currently trying to cultivate some more civilised hobbies that don't involve waiting at train stations for drug dealers while bragging about it on the phone to "friends".

- Another important thing to consider is university. You're studying law I see. Have you applied for training contracts/vac schemes yet? (This is a British thing, apologies if it isn't relevant). If not, throw yourself into that. I'm actually doing exactly that at the minute, and although i'm far from clean, i've found that focusing intently on such a goal is helping me to appreciate being sober/hangover free. I'm enjoying how cognitively sharp I am feeling in comparison to how I felt a few weeks ago, and trying to savour each breath/each inch of progress towards becoming a solicitor.

Anyway, I suppose these "tips" aren't really tips after all, but I like to reach out to fellow young people who are having difficulties. It is probably a semi-selfish thing; it makes me feel less alone in my own struggle, since as I said in my first point, no-one my age even recognises our problem, never-mind consciously suffers at the hands of it. I hope you feel slightly less alone knowing there's one more young alcoholic out there. If you ever want a chinwag let me know, and I hope at the least you can find something to help you in this post .