wanttobehappy

Hi there,
I havent been on here for quite a while, but i am hoping somebody who has been in a similar situation can offer me some advice.
I will try not to ramble too much. My o/h and i have been together for four years, we have a daughter who is three soon. I did not realise he had a problem with alcohol until i was pregnant, it gradually become more regular, in the evenings only i believed at the time, but then came verbal abuse and
incidents of him smashing things in the house, police being called etc. I later found out he was also using cocaine, and only found out tonight that it was more than i knew at that time, to the point that he spent a heck of a lot of money on it weekly, and i always wondered why with a great job we never had any spare cash for holidays etc. I left with my daugher when he was drinking, I went back on promises to quit which happened for a while then it ramped back up again. I left last year for four months, he went into rehab for a few weeks, and i went back. It was ok for a while, then four months ago it happened again,and on this occasion it was the scariest and most upsetting. I left again, he went to rehab for ten days, so only a detox really, but has been going back to the clinic weekly or fortnightly for overnight stay or session. I am still living apart from him, but havent closed the door on the relationship, although up until about six weeks ago i was adamant that it was over for the sake of my daughter, and for myself. But, me being the hopeful, stupid girl that i am that so desperately wants to keep a family together, and hope every time he sorts himself out, ive let him spend time with us. I suspected this evening he had a drink as he was niggly and looking glazed around the eyes, and he admitted after a lot of pressure that he had drunk a bottle of vodka after work in the lane around the corner from the house, and that he had done so every night for the last three weeks. He then text his counseller to arrange a session this weekend. He really hasnt been in recovery at all, he said he had a few 'slips' then a few weeks without, now this every night. I feel such a fool, for thinking again it would be ok, and i feel terrible for confusing my daughter with him being there not being there etc. Its hard because he is a good father, and my daughter was so upset when we split having to split time with her between us, but i know living with an alcoholic is going to be a life time of upset if he doesnt get sober.
The most important thing of course is making sure she is ok, but i feel so guilty that she has to leave me to see him when we are apart, because she only wants to see him when we are together, she is quite clingy to me but loves daddy when im there. I also feel guilty that i am not or havent been a supportive partner, ive been to al anon and meetings at the clinic with lots of people who support their partners and go through the relapses, and cope with it. But i dont know if i can do that.
Has anyone else been in this situation, can you give me any advice, or has anyone been through this and come out the other side with a sober partner?
Thanks for reading