Big hugs to you.
I'm sure someone has said this before, but I found that the only people who could really understand the wild mix of feelings you experience after breaking up with an addict (or for that matter while living with one) were other people who had been there. The people here, and the people at Al-Anon.
Other people might try to understand, but they were sort of talking about either feelings that were like dessert or feelings that were like a main course, and my feelings were a mix of sushi and icecream with some coffee beans mixed in. My "normal" friends couldn't follow how I could hate him and yet not want to leave him. It didn't compute for them.
Many, many people in Al-Anon are introverts. I became an introvert by being married to an A. I can promise you that if you go to enough meetings (and nobody's going to force you to bare your soul!), you'll find yourself surrounded by people who get it and who make you feel less lonely.