I think you have to work on your Big Plan? Right now it's only about 5 days big...we gotta expand that Big Plan so that it is Forever big!
Don't get me wrong...I'm not trying to minimize the effort required to quit. I know it's not as simple as just saying "I will never drink again and I will never change my mind". There's a lot of growth and learning and understanding and trial and error that has to take place before you will get to the point that OTT described - where you actually make a commitment to forever...I still smile when I think of the day that it happened for me.
Some people quit one day at a time...some 5 days at a time...some for a month...some for a year...some till some foggy moment in the future when the time is just right. But as long as the AV knows that his day is coming, he's happy to bid his time and wait you out.
I can still remember early on when I was trying to quit and saying to myself...don't worry, this isn't forever...you'll get your booze...just not for a while...I've got to prove that I don't have a problem first...give me 60 days, then we'll talk. At 64 days I drank...surprise, surprise!
It took me 6 more months to figure out FOREVER.