L2F- just like kyles I am a newbie to SR too. However I am not a newbie to living/ loving an addict. Your feelings are totally normal! I too feel the same way. I read these posts that break my heart, I write posts that break my heart, I live the drama w/ an addict, I read anything and everything online about addiction/codependency/saving your marriage etc. ANd it leaves me feeling like this- Why am I trying so hard? Why am I doing all this to try to save my marriage while my AH doesnt do a darn thing to save it? WHy am I trying to make myself better when he just drags me right back down?Why is it all so 1 sided? Why am I even here w him? blah blah blah. It also leaves me feeling just plain sick of it all! I wish I could answer your question about how to get out of that funk but I havent yet mastered that one. I havent mastered alot about addiction actually. I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone in your feelings of being sick of it. ANd your feelings of just picking up and leaving. All I can say is what everyone else keeps telling me, which is doing something for yourself when you are feeling this way. I have tried that and it does help some, or atleast it gets my mind off of it for a little bit.