Originally Posted by
lizatola 
We can never go back, and that right there may be the problem.
Actually, I agree with this. I found myself in the same position. I started growing as a person and pretty much left him behind. He went in a totally different direction. And even if he would have somehow been able to be the man he was when I married him, I had changed so much by then that it still wouldn't have worked.
Like you, I thought married people grew together. And, in an ideal world, that's how it would work. But, in the real world, people change. And not always in the same ways.
Life does not have a "reverse" gear. It only goes forward. If we spend too much time gazing in the rear view mirror, we crash.
It seems you keep justifying why you picked him, how he was when you married him. It doesn't matter. It's not who he is now. Is who he is now the person you want to be married to? That's really the only question that matters.
L