I lived like that for over a decade.. It became I had to drink in order to not cut my fingers up, I am chef. So I would get to the restaurant early just to be able to have a couple heavy shots to fuction...
I hope you dont put yourself through the years of torture as I did.. Get help..
Be honest see a doctor and detox..
I am a member of AA and wouldnt be here to type these words without that change..
