AlaskaGirl, the idea of 'never' was unsettling at first to me too, until I realized that it was really unsettling to my AV, whereas my rational mind was good with the idea. I would think that any panicky feelings come from the AV, not your rational mind, because fear and self doubt are the realm of the beast.
You can take your Big Plan to the next level by realizing that never drinking again means never drinking no matter what. No matter how dull you think you will be, no matter if all of your friends desert you (it's your AV there), no matter how depressed, how 'unfun' and so on, it just ain't gonna happen. You sobriety is unconditional.
I don't know if I have helped at all, but let's take this to the AVRT thread, Alaska Girl. That is where this conversation belongs, so that it's kept for posterity. It is important, OK? See you there.