It sounds like you have a good boundary there, but the key is to keep it. If you have told her that you won't fund her recovery if she isn't following the rules, then you have to be willing to hold to that. Otherwise, it's just an empty threat.
If I was doing all that for my daughter and she told me to get the heck out of her business, I would do just that. I know how hard it is, but if she isn't willing to put her all into recovery, then it just isn't going to work and you will have spent all that money for nothing.
Welcome to SR! I'm sorry for what brings you here, but glad you found us. Please read read around the forum. You will find that you are not alone. We're here to support you.