These are amazing - laughing and crying at the same time.
Here's mine:
ME: I'd like you to help me with dishes more. (last night)
AB: All you try to do is manipulate, control, and CHANGE ME (I can only assume he's referring to several months ago when I said I'd like him to drink less?!??) *pours another drink, slams door, heads for back yard.
Yeah... I'd really just like you to do the dishes... say 1 out of 10 times
quack quack QUACK