I'm wondering what your A husband finds helpful or useful about what he wrote there. What exactly is his point, I'm sure he can go to the bar , or to his best friend, or on the internet for that matter and be validated and then use it as a weapon to wound you more, to make you question yourself. I have to say Liz, what he wrote made me sick to my stomach, that you are again enduring more emotional trauma, these things seep into our psyches, it's very damaging.
When is enough enough. It's a circle jerk. In your heart of heart you have a real desire to make this work, his only real desire is to take no responsibility, to continue to live his life in denial and grandiosity, it won't change anytime soon is my guess. I hurt for you today.
It is possible to still spend the holidays together and not live together. If kicking his ass out is not his bottom, then he has many many more vicious and soul wounding words to hurl at you to get to continue his life as he sees fit.
He has shared that he thinks I'm being poisoned mentally by my sister's divorce and that I spend so much time helping her out on this, he might want to take a look at his own poisoning of your heart, caused by him, before he starts blaming your sister for his loss of marital closeness. Of course it's your sisters fault,
Take good care, love to you Katie