Good analogy. Yes I feel like the frog and I after 27 years together, I am about to croak. The thing is I saw all the warning signs back then the first time he turned on me with his self-centered nasty behavior and I put up with it. I knew he was an alcoholic when we started dating but I had such low self-esteem and he has such a strong over-the-top personality that I bathed in his presence. He still has that personality to the public. Only I see the broken man that he really is but even with me he can fool me into believing he has it all together. It is like being held captive and not being able to escape. Why? Because we choose not to escape, it is too difficult and hurts too much to escape. Beginning a new life at 54 years old, well thats seems inconceivable to me right now. So if you are young, don't wait as long as I have. Jump out of that boiling water. My plan is to take it a day at a time and try to make a life outside of this house, work on my independence and self-esteem and maybe one day I will jump out of the water too.