Originally Posted by
lizatola 
Then he asked me, "He wouldn't lie to me, would he mom?" I mean, he's not going to drink again is he? I didn't have the heart to tell him that dad never quit drinking. I cried and cried after sending my son to take a shower. You know, it's so easy to handle it when the A lies to you, but when you know they lied to the kids....God, it kills me.
I remember asking my grandmother the same question when I was 13 and my parents had just separated and were heading for divorce. Her answer has stuck with me my whole life:
Sometimes people will say something and honestly believe that it is the truth at the time they are saying it. But afterwards they might change their mind. It is like when you promise to do something and then something else happens and you change your mind and decide to do it later and somehow never get around to it.
She used the example of my many promises to clean up my room. I was a messy kid, and my room always looked like it had been hit by a hurricane. And I totally got it. My Mom and Dad weren't exactly lying to me. They were just later changing their minds or postponing it for some vague undefined later time.
It was a lesson that has helped me throughout my life. Now I take all promises with a grain of salt and wait to see what actually happens. Sometimes I am even pleasantly surprised when a promise is kept. But it stops me from being too upset when a promise is broken since I have gotten into the habit of always making a backup plan and not totally relying on other people's promises.
Perhaps the next time you find yourself in a similar conversation with your son, you could take the opportunity to help him understand that Dad is a person, and people change their minds. It is not quite saying that Dad outright lies to him, but will make him aware that he shouldn't always take people at their word.